Fabulous Factoid, #8: You Might Be a Liberal...

In which Y't O'b'd't S'v't describes some of the more prominent clinical symptoms attributed, not to mere "liberals," but to "GODDAM LIBRULS!"

Ever since Jeff Foxworthy made a gazillion dollars reminding folks of the circumstances of redneckhood, there's been an irresistible urge for other groups to play with a similar meme. The other day on Fbook, the 'leftish blog' "Addicting Info" indulged itself, with a list that indicated YOU might be a librul if, and included 33 indices, including:

1. You can discern the geographic distance between Kenya and Hawaii.
2. Bernie Sanders is one of your favorite senators.
3. You’re seriously considering dropping Verizon and switching to Credo Mobile.
4. You get much of your news from Rachel Maddow, Bill Maher and/or Jon Stewart.
and 5: You’re in favor of tax increases to support the common good even if you have to pay more yourself.

They invited additions, and here's a few I came up with:

If you think and say that indoctrinating children to fear "god" while they still believe in Santa and the Tooth Fairy is psychological child abuse...

If you use recycled totes when make your groceries...

If you think sex is just sex, and all the rest is adjectives...

If you believe the 2nd Amendment entitles everyone to have a flint-lock musket, stored in a common armory with the powder and shot...

If you understand the principle of "habeas corpus" and hold its extinguishment to be the equivalent of a a capital crime (if you believed in capital punishment, which you don't)...

If you think indiscriminately slaughtering civilians in counter-insurgencies half-a-world away is repugnant and immoral, no matter WHICH "party" is doing it...

If you think "press concentration" was and is the death-knell of an informed electorate...

If you think Ronald Reagan was the indisputably WORST president in history...

If you have ever even heard of the Precautionary Principle or the Powell Memorandum...

If you've shut off the ignition at a long stop-light...

If you've given money to a beggar, and don't care if they drink it...and finally:

If you inhaled, exhaled, and inhaled and held it...

See ya at the beach, hippies; now back to my man Winstone & Hippie Central