As The Cookie Crumbles: Accomplishment

I am growing daily more and more averse to and impatient with the smug, snarky reminders of the splendiferousness, magnificence, and accomplishments of St. Barry, the Incumbent; you've seen 'em: his "Two Hundred Forty Four Accomplishments?"

Here's a recent example, en precis:

See what I mean? More revisionist BULLSHIT! While the dung is still damp and stinky, they're spinning it into shapes of their own design.

Let's examine the claims:

It SEZ he "killed Osama." But we have no actual evidence of that. We have people SAYING they killed him. But there were people SAYING they killed him in Tora Bora in 2002, too. There is no physical evidence of it that I ever saw. When they killed Dillinger, the cops posed with the corpse. Nothing like that here; so we can say that's pretty thin gruel to feast upon for heroism and heroism.

Toppled Gadafffi: On whose say so? What gives him or ANY Murkin potentate the right to 'topple' the legitimate ruler of ANY sovereign state. And start ANOTHER war in the Middle East for which we are expending billions of dollars. And then he claims the right to exercise extra-judicial powers nobody EVER said they had before to assassinate an AMERICAN CITIZEN with drone missiles, 10,000 miles away No trial, none of the civilized niceties. Just "Blammo!" What the fuck??

Prevented 2nd Major Depression: Oh, fucking really? Three of my tenants are currently STILL unemployed after almost two years. 46 million in poverty, 20 plus million unemployed, record home repossessions continuing, stagnant wages, diminishing benefits, but record corpoRat profits, banksters awash in money, mergers flourishing and in general, big money is prospering. Anything wrong with that picture?

Then it's BRAGGING that he didn't drown any major cities through indifference and political calculation during the last spate of nature's fury from a hurricane? The implication is that we should be glad he didn't fuck up? How high is that bar? I see crawfixh jumpin' that puppy.(End end image here)

FUCK the donuts!
I WANT THE 4TH AMENDMENT BACK.
I want an economy back.
I want Habeas corpus back.
I want Glass-Steagal back.
I want the fucking wars over. more than anything, I WANT THE FUCKING WARS OVER, you church-talking, skeevy, jug-eared, son-of-a-bitch!
End the wars, and we don't HAVE a financial crisis.
Just end the fucking wars!

As CiC, you can do it by fiat.

Just order the troops to stop shooting and to stay in their bivouacs.

Dare Congress NOT to fund their withdrawal. Analogously with TR, sending the Great White Fleet off without enough coal to return, and daring Congress not to buy fuel to bring 'em back.

Tell 'em you'll just let 'em rot, in Afghanistan and Iraq, if Congress wont spend the money to bring 'em back.

And if the Generals and the CorpoRats and their flunkies, gunsels, and lickspittles then arise and overthrow you, well, fine.

At least we'll know, unambiguously, where we stand and can plan accordingly.

Right hippies?